Back off!

I just received a phone call from Human Resources. A funny one.

I am a pretty prominent person in our organization (not important, just very visible), and if you haven't noticed, I have a sense of humor... and people like that. I am also sarcastic, but loving, compassionate and get along with people of all ranks: from the cleaning crew to the Executives (even the ones that don't say hello to ANYONE who is not another Executive).

Needless to say, word has gotten around that my departure is imminent. Sunshine is now 3 hours away, and I am looking for a job in the same city so we can reunite the family. Still, I told my Job-Husband that without such job, I cannot leave my current position. I hated to leave him hanging and not allowing the process of finding my replacement to take its course, but financially, we can't do it. He told me that it would be fine, that he is no hurry to replace me while I am here (See? He got over his issues).

But I digress, as I walk around, people are asking me if it's true that I'm leaving, that I will be missed, that I am not allowed to leave, who is going to do this, who's going to be as nice- you know, all the stuff that you wish you can bottle up and use on days that you feel like crap about your job...

And then, there are the HR calls...

LW: Good afternoon, this is LW.

HR: LW? It's "Informant" from HR. How are you?

LW: Doing good! What's up?

HR: Ummm... Is it true that you are leaving?

LW: Yes! Eventually. My husband finally got a job, but it's three hours away. We're pretty excited. Why?

HR: Well, I was wondering...

LW: Why?

HR: Because I have received two emails of people applying for your job.

LW: But... I haven't resigned yet... and I don't know when I will be resigning... um... is the job posted?

HR: No, that's the point. I didn't know that you were leaving and then I got this, and I freaked out a little, because I didn't know what was going on!

LW: Can you tell me who was it?

HR: Sure.... It was... "There's no way she'll ever be able to do this job" and "She'll never get this job".

LW: (Laughing)... Interesting... Don't worry. When I am ready to leave, I will officially resign, I will give my two weeks notice and I will make sure that I have a good-bye party.

I should've known... The buzzards are already gathering... Back off, bitches! I am not dead yet!