Saturday, January 30, 2010

Dear Uncle Sam: I don't appreciate your sense of humor

Dear Uncle Sam:

As the snow storm of the season locked me in my house with Sunshine and the kids, I decided to use my time in a positive way. Sooo.... instead of spending $400 getting my taxes done, I claimed the dinner table and went at it.

I am a responsible woman, Uncle. I believe in contributing to society. I believe in helping others and I believe in paying my share of your care for me. My children go to public school, so I pay. My husband is on unemployment, so I don't mind paying. The snow plow drove by this morning, so I was happy to see my money at work. So WHAT IS UP WITH THE 100 INSTRUCTION BOOKLET TO FILL OUT A 2 PAGE DOCUMENT????? AND EVERY LINE REFERS YOU TO ANOTHER BOOKLET OF INFORMATION AND ANOTHER 2 PAGE DOCUMENT???

Now, dearest Uncle, I am a VERY smart woman. I have a bachelor's degree, I have a Master's degree, I read books like they are magazines, I watch the Discovery channel (although I have to admit, not much lately since we got Netflix), I can squeeze a penny like no other and I balance a budget the way YOU can't. After 5 hours last night, I completed my first draft. Today, I spent 3 additional hours fixing the mistakes that I made after my brain oozed out of my head... and to make things worse, every mistake I fixed for you, impacted my state return - another nightmare conceived while a demon was strolling through Hades, torturing kittens and still found himself bored.

Uncle, I don't mind paying you, but it doesn't make a lot of sense that I have to contract an agency to be able to figure out our returns.

Thanks for listening, Uncle.

-Loving Wife, Working Mom

P.S. By the way, while you are at it, was up with your nephew State Income Tax charging me $45 to e-file my federal and state return? No thanks. I have mailed my return with two 44cents stamps. The accountants didn't get my money this year, but the Postal Service did.


Dory said...

I like your way of thinking:) I need to get at my taxes to! I think i'll put it off one more day!!

Brandy said...

We paid this year and ended up owing. That's the ultimate let down when you PAY someone to tell you bad news.

So next year I'm using Turbo tax. Or maybe, just maybe I will break out the forms like you did. :)

Loving Wife, Working Mom said...

Dory: I still haven't met anyone who likes doing taxes, refund or no refund... not even the accountants can admit to such a thing. It's part of the punishment.

Loving Wife, Working Mom said...

Brandy, I amd SERIOUSLY considering TurboTax for next year. Eight hours doing this stupid thing is just ridiculous. Plus, any time you change ONE number it changes 30 pages...